* More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.
* I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
* The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This recentlybecame all too apparent to me and consequently I will never be ending a work email with the phrase "Regards" again.
* There is a great need for sarcasm font.
* How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?*
* Was learning cursive really necessary?
* Lol has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say".
* I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
* MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
* Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.*
* You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the rest of the day.
* Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart my collection.
* "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever or "says who!"
* While watching the Olympics, I find myself cheering equally for China and USA .No, I am not of Chinese descent, but I am fairly certain that when Chinese athletes don't win, they are executed*
* As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
* I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
* I wonder if cops ever get annoyed at the fact that everyone they drive behindobeys the speed limit.
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HAHAA. I laughed SO hard, mom. Multiple times. I have many of these thoughts many-a-time. What are the astrisks for? Also, we have decided that the use of italics should be the universal sarcasm font. What else is it good for?
ReplyDeletePS - several of those people in my cell phone don't even have names, that's how much I don't want to talk to them. "Home Teacher Dude", "Target Guy" to name a few
ReplyDeleteGreat list. It really made me laugh! I can't wait to hear more of your random thoughts. And also, let me know if you learn how to fold a fitted sheet. I have started to just roll them up in a ball.
ReplyDeleteHAHAHAHAHa! Wow, we need more of these from you! I feel like I know you so much better... and I will never be able to finish telling you a story again!
ReplyDeleteI don't even know how to tell you all this but I guess this will be the last time I copy and paste an email. Sorry, these are not my orginal "random thoughts" just ones that I totally agree with. I don't know where to feel guilting for copying or glad to think you might have thought me that brilliant. HAHAHA, guilt will always come first. All future random thoughts will be my own and then we can determine how brilliant I am. Hope you guys have a good day.
ReplyDeletePS-the trick to folding a fitted sheet is just the amount of time you want to speed trying to make the top of it look smooth and stuffing the rest of it underneath.